The Difference Between 2 Hours of Marriage and 30-Something Years of Marriage

What’s the difference between two hours of marriage and 30-something years of marriage? Well, maybe my experience this weekend can help us understand.

My niece Erin was married to Michael this weekend in a ceremony that was beautiful and touching and—in a positive way—one of the most creative wedding ceremonies I have ever attended. Even now, as I think about my brother, Cam’s, words to Erin and Michael in the ceremony, I get a lump in my throat. Oh…wait a minute…nevermind, that “lump” was the jawbreaker I was eating. But, still, it truly was a lovely and tender wedding.

Two hours after they were pronounced husband and wife, Erin and Michael, would look at each other from time to time, during the course of the reception, with a tenderness and compassion that could melt cold steel. You could tell that from Michael’s standpoint, Erin is the most beautiful, wonderful and magnificent creature God has ever created. Likewise, you could tell from Erin’s expression that every beat of her heart was quietly saying, “Michael….I love you.”

Picture the most romantic scene you could ever imagine. Got it? Okay, now understand that Michael and Erin’s glances at each other during the reception were twice as romantic.

That’s “two hours” of marriage for you. Pretty nice, huh?

Now, consider the airline flight of a couple…oh, let’s see…we’ll call them Mark and Lori, (especially since those are their names). Mark and Lori have been married for close to 30 years, or more. (I’m not sure the exact number, but it’s been a while.) On their way into town from the East Coast, to attend Erin and Michael’s wedding, Mark and Lori’s jet was hit by lightning. Really. They saw a bright light, almost like a strobe light, and as the passengers were curiously discussing what happened, the pilot informed them that the plane had, in fact, been hit by lightning and they would be turning around to return to their point of departure.

“Don’t panic, folks,” the pilot told them, “this kind of thing happens from time to time and the survival rate is relatively high. But if you believe in prayer, ask God to keep us all from dying.”*

This type of event can be frightening and unsettling. And Lori, with an understandable mixture of fear and concern began to cry. Mark (remember, somewhere around 30 years of marriage) said to his wife, “Oh, Lori, for crying out loud, get a grip!”

So, there it is. There’s the difference.

Two hours of marriage: Tender looks of compassion every 10 or 15 seconds that are almost unparalleled in their loving intensity.

Close to 30 years of marriage: “Oh, Lori, it’s just a little lightning while we’re racing through the air at 700 miles per hour, perhaps close to an imminent crash that will end our lives in a fiery explosion…get a grip!”

It’s interesting what a difference twenty-nine years, 364 days, and 22 hours can make.

[*NOTE: The pilot didn’t really say this, but in my imagination the story is better with this detail.]

** Posting from the Fairfield Inn, Anderson, Indiana