Constructive Thinking Rather Than Victimhood Thinking

Occasionally, I will be in a mood in which I catch myself thinking about circumstances in life which are unfavorable to me. It is not my nature to do this often but I will admit I do this once in a while.

If I do not notice this type of thinking quickly I can wind up doing a “woe is me” session in which I gradually attempt to convince myself…

“I’ve got it rough.”

“The odds are stacked against me.”

“I must not have what it takes.”

“I did not get the proper direction when I was younger.”

Or some other version of “poor me, I’m a victim of these hostile and unhelpful circumstances of life.”

As a pastor, I have counseled many hurting people and this experience has revealed to me that everyone has difficulties; rough moments of life; and some sense in which they have been victimized.

However, I honestly do not believe it is helpful for us to think of ourselves as victims. Again I understand that people are sometimes victimized by circumstances of life—some people, certainly, more than others—and some people have been victimized in such a way that they genuinely deserve significant help.

But to dwell on hardships, difficulties and obstacles and to convince ourselves that our victimization creates insurmountable limitations and prevents forward progress in life is simply not helpful. To define ourselves—in our own minds—as victims will not result in hopeful thinking; helpful thinking; helpful action; or real solutions. In fact, it seems more likely to lead to a passive, resigned sense of hopelessness.

As I wrote earlier, I have fallen into victimhood thinking on occasion and it has never resulted in any positive help. It is not constructive or beneficial.

I will admit this is a generalization, however, in most cases it will tend to be true: If we think we are a victim with no chance of moving forward, it is very likely we will be a victim with no chance of moving forward.

It will be better and healthier to think of ourselves as persons of hope, possibility and dignity, created in the image of God for a purpose. It will be helpful to think of ourselves as resourceful agents who are able to exercise free will and, with God’s help, able to make good, consequential, positive, helpful, constructive, imaginative, potent and meaningful choices.

Remember: Things Once Considered Impossible Are Now Possible

It’s interesting to remember that things which were considered impossible in the not too distant past have been found to be possible, after all.

In a book I was looking through this morning I came across an anecdote regarding Robert H. Goddard who was “the driving force behind America’s early space programs.”

Apparently, Goddard was mocked many years ago in the New York Times for believing a rocket could travel through outer space. In the Times it was pointed out that Goddard did not even possess “the knowledge ladled out daily in high schools.” Not a very nice thing to write about a respected scientist, huh? But that did not cause Goddard to quit.

The thinking against Goddard’s ridiculous idea of space travel went like this: “With no atmosphere in outer space and therefore nothing for an engine to thrust against… a rocket couldn’t move an inch. That was in 1920.”

Of course, we now know the experts regarding what-is-possible and what-is-impossible at the New York Times, in 1920, were wrong.

In the late 1960s—following the Apollo 11 mission which reached the moon—the Times made a reference to their earlier editorial, writing “the Times regrets the error.” When that happened I doubt if Goddard pointed, made faces and laughed at them. Eminent scientists don’t typically behave that way…I think.

Hey, it’s easy to be tough on the New York Times for their shortsightedness but this is a great example of the point I’m getting at: A mission which seemed literally impossible according to the laws of science (as many educated people understood them at the time) turned out to be possible, after all.

I like the idea that we still don’t know everything and that there are all kinds of possibilities we have not yet exhausted. It helps me feel optimistic and hopeful. And it reminds me of someone I know.

“Jesus looked at them and said, ‘With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.’"  Matthew 19:26

[ I read the anecdote about Robert Goddard in a book titled, “Get Out Of Your Own Way” by Robert K. Cooper ]

Taking Responsibility Reminds Us That Real Leadership Is Challenging

When we encounter a leader who makes it known in the organization he or she leads that his people need to take the fall so he [the leader] will not have to be responsible for his own actions/mistakes, what we are observing is a terrible leader. As a matter of fact, this is actually the opposite of true leadership.

Not surprisingly this method of operating is probably somewhat normal in the world of political leadership. I’m not taking sides here. This tactic of having low-level staffers or other underlings take the fall on behalf of the person at the high level occurs with both republican and democrat politicians.

A number of these people—on both sides of the aisle—are ego-driven, seekers of power who have very little interest in serving others. Their primary motivation for seeking office is an almost pure form of selfishness. They are not leaders, in the true sense of the word, they are professionally postured and polished narcissists.

I know this is just one, sad, lonely post that will make no difference in the big scheme of things but I felt like expressing this thought, anyhow. The reality I describe above is a reminder that authentic leadership is tremendously challenging.

P.S. By the way, I wrote this thought a couple of years ago regarding something I had seen on a political TV show and chose not to post it for a while. So, this is not specifically directed at any current political person or event. Although I am sure it applies to plenty of current political figures.

P.P.S.  Some of the people who read this might be thinking, “Oh yeah Dan, what you’re describing about people in the world of politics happens in the realm of religious leadership, too. So there, Buster!!!” My response to that is: Sadly, you are correct. It does. But that still doesn’t make it right. It just reveals to us that some of these people have no business being in leadership positions, as well.

I repeat: Authentic leadership is tremendously challenging.

“Pray…for kings and all who are in authority…” 1 Timothy 2:2

Becoming Aware of How We Talk To Ourselves

Some literature I’ve been reading lately has prompted me to take more careful notice of the way I speak to myself. Unfortunately, some of what I have noticed has not been very good.

I’m referring to the talk that happens in my mind. It is not out loud. It is only “heard” by me. And I am specifically referring to how I speak to myself, not how I think or talk about others—that’s another matter for another post.

I have noticed I am rude, overly negative and even downright mean in the way I speak to myself. This is a very strange thing to really become aware of. I know, you might be thinking, “It sounds like Dan needs to find a good counselor.” But the truth is we all talk to ourselves. This is part of our thought life. I have simply begun to pay more attention to how I am engaging in this self-talk.

Because of how I grew up and where I come from I suspect it’s possible I have developed this way of speaking to myself believing that I am being very direct and honest. Since it’s just me, I’m cutting the nonsense, getting right to the point and saying what needs to be said forcefully. Since I’m just talking to myself and no one else can hear what is being communicated there is no need for pussyfooting around, right?

But I am understanding this negative, mean self-talk is unhealthy and unhelpful. It might even be fair to say it can have damaging effects. I would never speak to another person the way I speak to myself. Seriously. (Frankly, I would stand a good chance of getting punched in the face if I did.)

Obviously, I do not believe it will be helpful to lie to myself or attempt to convince myself I am something which I am not. Positive self-talk does not mean self-deception. But I am realizing it will be alright, in fact, I think it will be helpful to be kind, patient, encouraging, gracious, considerate, loving and honest in the way I speak to myself. In much the same way it would be helpful to be kind, patient, encouraging, gracious, considerate, loving and honest in the way I speak to others.

Praying That People Will See the Truth of Jesus In Me

A very encouraging exchange happened to me several years ago. A person who was somewhat skeptical about Christianity posed this question to me regarding my faith in Christ, “You really believe this stuff, don’t you?”

I’m not even sure the person meant it in a complimentary way, but I was encouraged and received it as a compliment.

PRAYER:  Lord Jesus, I pray that you would be alive in me in such an unmistakably authentic way that the people I encounter would say, “Hmm, this Jesus stuff must be real and life in Him must be true because I believe I genuinely see it in this person.”

Choosing To See The Activity of God

Very recently God has prompted me to see something helpful—something I needed to see. It has to do with a personal issue I have been struggling with a bit lately.

The way God helped me to grasp what He wanted me to see involved another person.

As I have thought about this activity of God in my life it occurs to me that I could see what happened as a simple coincidence. I could view the interaction in this way: “Hey, it’s one of those crazy arbitrary things that happen. Now lay down and take a nap.” I could understand the timing of the situation to be lucky and interesting but entirely the result of random chance.

But I believe God is real and active and I believe He loves me [and you, too] enough to arrange the affairs of our lives in this way.

I guess what I’m trying to communicate is: We can decide not to see the work of God in our lives if that’s what we choose. Or, we can be willing to see, to recognize and to appreciate.

It is my desire to see.

Our Value In the Cultural Pecking Order And In The Eyes of God

Every society has what could be described as a “pecking order” which we understand to have much to do with our worth and value as human beings. I’m not saying this pecking order is good, I’m not defending the social pecking order I’m simply acknowledging that it exists.

Virtually everyone has some understanding of his/her value as a person based on where we view ourselves in the pecking order. In American culture some of the factors    that contribute to value in the social pecking order are looks, financial standing, skills, intelligence, relational connections, fame or lack of fame, talent, age…and there are numerous other factors, as well.

There are even factors which contribute to worth and value in the social pecking order among the many subcultures to which we all belong in the culture at large. So, we can find ourselves thinking of our value on these other levels, as well.

Again please understand, I am not defending or approving of this social pecking order. And I am not suggesting this is a correct determinant of our value. I am describing the existence of these issues.

I am also raising the subject as a reminder to myself. Occasionally, I find myself thinking that my value is not very high because I do not rate highly in the social pecking order. (I’m not writing this to evoke sympathy. Frankly, I think what I do in this regard is fairly common. I believe there are probably quite a few of us who think of ourselves as rating fairly low in the social pecking order.)

When I consider the fact that I may not rate highly in the social pecking order I try—with God’s help, I am genuinely making an effort—to remember my inherent worth and value is not determined by how I rank in the cultural pecking order. My worth and value is rooted in the truth that I have been intentionally and lovingly created by the One who spoke the universe into existence.

No matter how we rank in the cultural pecking order, you and I really do possess inherent dignity, worth and value because we are made in the image of God.

This truth of our inherent value may be a well-known idea to some of us and it might even seem obvious but, to be honest, it is easy to forget in the day to day living of life. So, I am reminding me… and I am reminding you, too.

The Quiet, Gradual Drift of Spiritual Warfare

Spiritual warfare does not necessarily involve lots of noise, overt carnage, tremendous drama, or heads spinning around in Exorcist-like fashion. If a person gradually drifts away from God in peaceful, quiet apathy thinking, [with a big yawn] “none of this stuff about God really matters” …the Evil One is perfectly content with the end result.

Frozen Pizzas Fall On The Floor And I Build Character

I was at the grocery store early this morning and I carefully pulled one pizza from the freezer case. Suddenly 8 other frozen pizzas shifted, then slipped, then fell out of the freezer case onto the floor.

When I picked up 3 of the 8 pizzas and placed them back on the freezer shelf 2 more pizzas slipped and fell out of the case onto the floor. I felt like I was in a scene from a mildly amusing Superbowl ad.

A woman walked past pushing her cart and staring at me with a look that seemed to say, “Why are you throwing frozen pizzas on the ground? You shouldn’t do that.”

I wanted to say, “Surely you know I didn’t do this on purpose, right?”

But I held my tongue. (Proving that miracles do occur.)

I’m told these types of life experiences help build character.

…So I’ve got that going for me.

A Text Was A Simple Act of Kindness

A friend sent me a very simple text recently. The brief message included positive words of love, encouragement and appreciation. The person who sent the text could not have known this but the timing happened to be just right.

This thoughtful action by my friend couldn’t have taken much more than a minute, or so, however it brought a wonderful ray of inspiration and joy to my life.

Small acts of kindness can often bring significant benefit to the recipient of the kindness. When we do something that touches a person’s heart in a good, positive and uplifting way—even if the action is small—we are doing something beautiful and sacred.

What if we all quietly did something beautiful and sacred for someone today? 

A Resurrection Is The Best Explanation of the Facts

Dr. William Lane Craig, is a theologian and scholar who has spent decades carefully examining theological issues, in particular, the resurrection of Jesus. Dr. Craig states these four facts “are widely accepted by New Testament scholars today.”

Fact number 1: After his crucifixion, Jesus was buried by Joseph of Arimathea in the tomb.

Fact number 2: On the Sunday following the crucifixion, Jesus’ tomb was found empty by a group of his women followers.

Fact number 3: On multiple occasions and under various circumstances, different individuals and groups of people experienced appearances of Jesus alive from the dead.

And… Fact number 4: The original disciples believed that Jesus was risen from the dead despite their having every reason not to.

There are many more things which could be said in support of each of these four statements but a great question to consider in light of these truths would be this: What is the best explanation of these facts?

If you are my friend on social media you already know my position on the matter, but I will state it here, anyhow: the best explanation for these four facts is that God, the Father, raised Jesus from the dead.

You say, “Yeah, but if you believe that explanation it means you have to believe a miracle occurred.”

That’s true. But it’s okay. He’s God. He is capable of performing miracles. In fact, what we consider miraculous is actually simple and natural to Almighty God.

“He isn't here! [The tomb.] He is risen from the dead, just as he said would happen.”

Matthew 28:6

E-Flash From Dan, March 23, 2016

Dear E-Flash Friends;

We are geared up and excited here at the church. We’ve been having rehearsals in the evenings, people are praying, invitations are being extended, I’m still tweaking and honing an Easter message I pray will be interesting, helpful, inspiring, challenging and used by God. The time has almost arrived for our Easter services.

 

I know most of you are aware but I’ll mention the schedule again:

Good Friday service, March 25, 7pm

Easter services, Saturday, March 26, at 5pm and Sunday March 27 at 9 and 11am.

I’m already thanking God for the good things I know He is going to do!

Can you think of someone you might invite? Why not take a little risk and make an invitation. The worst that could happen is the person would say “no thanks.” The best that could happen is a person could potentially have a life-changing encounter with the risen Lord Jesus. Who knows?

I’m looking forward to seeing you this weekend.

He is risen!

Love and blessings,

Dan

P.S. We created an Easter invitation video. It’s humorous and fun. Click on the link to watch. Perhaps you could pass this along to a friend.

                         LINK: Click Here!