That Rat Sure Has Long Ears

Yesterday, as I was walking out of the sanctuary after the 9 o’clock service, Larry Houtchens, Sr. said to me, “There’s trouble.  We have rats!”

At first I thought, “Gee, that’s not a very kind way to refer to the church leadership.”  But then I realized he meant REAL rats…the rodent kind.  Apparently, one had been spotted in the building.

Well, a little bit later, the elusive rat appeared, but he had very long ears.

Let me explain…

While I was delivering the message—the heartfelt, tearful, deeply emotional Father’s Day message—during the 11 o’clock service, I noticed a little more activity than usual out in the lobby.  Pretty quickly, I saw what was causing the uproar.  A bunny rabbit was hopping around inside our building, near the entrance to the sanctuary.  As I continued talking, I thought, “That must be someone’s pet rabbit that was brought to the church today.”  But as I looked more closely, I realized that it was a wild animal, not a pet rabbit.

Other people sitting in the sanctuary began to realize what was happening and many folks were turning around to look, so, I just acknowledged the matter and announced to everyone, “We have a wild rabbit in the building.”

Now, we’ve had ducklings holding Bible studies led by Ann Heroldt out in the church courtyard.  And once, I accidentally baptized my dog Jasper, thinking he had made a genuine commitment to the faith.  But we don’t normally have wildlife in the sanctuary during an actual service. 

We’re a fun and informal church and we like to do some creative programming elements during our services from time to time, but we don’t typically have wildlife coming in for a moment of prayer during the worship time.  As far as I can recall, we’ve never had any elk or bison partake of communion with us. ….(Well, okay, there was that ONE really strange Sunday, but I’m not counting that one.)  But my point is that wildlife, in the church building, during a service tends to be extremely rare, even at our church.

But, you know what?  This event indicated something important to me.  Sure, we don’t have thousands and thousands of PEOPLE who attend our church, that’s true.  But the WILD ANIMALS are just itching to get in.  We are getting tremendous word-of-mouth buzz about our church in the animal kingdom.  So, I suspect it’s only a matter of time.  Yep.  Pretty soon we’ll have squirrels and coyotes and raccoons and ring-tailed lemurs in the services every Sunday.

Hey, this must be what it feels like to be popular!

So, anyhow: “Grrrr FFfffftttlll  ZZZeeee HHHHooo chechecheche!”

(That’s groundhog-ese for “Have a nice week.”)

  

P.S.  The bunny rabbit was caught, unharmed, before the service was over and he was released into the custody of Larry Houtchens, Jr., who served him up with a side of cole slaw later that evening.

P.P.S.  That comment above is just a joke, please don’t send me stern messages about my cruelty to animals.  I’m just kidding.  I love animals.  After all, I’m like the Dr. Doolittle of ministers.  Larry did not cook the bunny rabbit.  (He prefers possum.)