Preventing Consequences May Not Be The Wise Course of Action

Sometimes we step in to prevent people from dealing with the consequences of their decisions, words and behaviors. This often happens because, with kind intentions, we believe sparing the person from painful consequences is the more compassionate and helpful response.

The truth, however, is that there will be times when the most compassionate and helpful response—particularly from a long-term perspective—will be to allow the person to face the consequences, even though they will be difficult and painful. Consequences are one of life’s most important forms of teaching and correction. Attempting to spare a person from this form of teaching and correction is typically not compassionate and helpful. It simply delays important learning.

And because the lessons have been postponed, sparing the consequences now can sometimes bring on the possibility of more significant, more severe consequences later.