High expectations are a compliment.

The Optimism of A Worst-Case-Scenario Thinker

I knew a guy who would always assume the worst case scenario was likely to happen when it came to the events of his life. This frustrated me because I thought he was too pessimistic. It seemed like he always had an attitude that threw a wet blanket on things.

But then I came to realize this fellow’s pessimistic worst-case-scenario approach to life was actually a coping mechanism he employed to keep from having his hopes dashed. Think about it: Most of the time something which is not as bad as the worst case scenario will occur. For those expecting the worst this will, therefore, wind up being better than they expected.

This approach would mean he would not have to deal with the kind of disappointment that might have occurred if his hopes were very high. So oddly enough, this worst-case-scenario type of thinking was my friend’s guarded attempt at being optimistic since his thinking typically resulted in outcomes which exceeded his expectations!

…But, to be honest, I still think he was too pessimistic.

Here’s a bit of biblical optimism for those who are trusting in Him: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28

Let's Not Let Our Hopes And Expectations Get Too Low

There is a temptation to lower our hopes and expectations in life because when high hopes and expectations are not achieved the disappointment tends to be more painful and discouraging.

I used to work with a guy who prided himself on never getting his hopes up so that he would never be disappointed by life.  (He wasn’t a particularly happy fellow to spend time with.)

We have to be careful with this type of coping strategy, however, because lowered hopes and expectations can make diminished outcomes a type of self-fulfilling prophecy.  Yes high hopes and expectations can hurt when they are not achieved, however, it is important for us to be willing to endure some disappointment and keep aiming high anyhow.

High Expectations Are A Sign of Respect

One of the most disrespectful and demeaning things we can do to people is expect very little from them.  Low expectations often communicate this to a person:  “I don’t think you are capable of much.”  Even if that is not what is said, that may be what is subtly communicated by low expectations.

On the other hand, high expectations may push us to a place of discomfort, however, it is an indication of respect when we communicate this type of message to a person:  “You can do better than this.”

I know this can be a sensitive and delicate move in a relationship—and I will admit, I’m not particularly good at doing this—but sometimes we need to lovingly push people by expecting something more, something higher, of them.