Lizard Hunting Expedition

Rachel and I like to catch the little geckos that can be found all over the place in Florida.  (Nadia never joins us in these expeditions, strange, huh?  You’d think this would be the kind of romantic adventure that every woman would be looking for.  Oh well, I remain puzzled…)

The geckos are very fast and usually they won’t let people get close before they dart into a hiding place.  But, sometimes—if you are diligent and patient—they can be caught.

When they are caught they are, of course, very nervous, at first.  You can tell because their breathing becomes rapid…and they chain-smoke Marlboros—that’s always a sign of nervousness.  After they relax a bit, though, they go back to casually smoking a pipe, with their feet up on the coffee table.  (All of the zoological textbooks are careful to note that geckos are outstanding relax-ers.)

Actually, the pipe-smoking line was just a joke.  But you knew that, already, didn’t you?  Seriously, after they relax a bit they will sometimes sit comfortably in the palm of your hand.  (Really.  Check out the picture of the gecko in Rachel’s hand.)

I caught one yesterday and after he calmed down, he sat in my hand as if he were a long time pet.  As he continued to get increasingly comfortable he made soft noises that were very hard to hear, but I held him close to my ear and I listened carefully and I heard this sound coming from the gecko:  “Fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more…”

Hey, at that point, I bought a policy.  Come on, you would, too.  Right?