My Book, Collector's Items & Elvis Sightings

I received a “Certificate of Registration” today from the Library of Congress, United States Copyright Office.  It’s a nice, simple but authoritative-looking document informing me that my book is officially registered and copyrighted with the Library of Congress.

It’s pretty exciting!

Upon reviewing the certificate I quickly looked up my book on Amazon.  You know how a book can be ranked as one of the top ten best sellers?  Well, my book is ranked as one of the 2.1 millionth in sales.  In other words, 2.1 million other books are selling better than mine.

Whew!  What a relief.  I was afraid that I might have slipped in the rankings.  It’s good to know that I’m still in that 2.1 million range.  (Insiders in the publishing industry have told me that Rick Warren is getting very nervous and he’s been crying a lot.)

The great news for the 37 people who own my book is that it is certain to become a very rare collector’s item that could, someday, be worth slightly more than $11.95—perhaps as much as $12.35.  (That’s if you keep it in really pristine condition; and I’m entangled in some type of controversy involving verifiable Elvis sightings.)

Click here to see book!

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A Good Old-Fashioned Technological Campfire

Last night, we had such wonderful brisk weather that I decided to start up a nice campfire in our fire pit.  After a roaring fire was underway, I sat back, communing with nature and enjoying the peace, quiet and tranquility for a full 8 and a half minutes.  Then I went inside and got my laptop computer and brought it out by the fire.

Since our house has Wi-Fi and I was close by the house in our back yard, I went on-line.  I tried to “Skype” Taylor but he didn’t appear to be on line.  So, I checked out Facebook and made a few comments.  Then I browsed a couple of web sites and looked up a book that I heard about on Amazon.  And, suddenly, it hit me.

“What am I doing?” I thought.  “I’m outside, relaxing, enjoying nature.  I’m engaging in something as primal and visceral and natural as humanity itself—sitting in front of a  fire—and I’m on the Internet at the same time?!?  This is nuts!”

I realized that this was one of those pivotal moments.  This was one of those moments where we would see what kind of person I am.  Am I going to be one of those people who is hopelessly tethered to the matrix-like artificial life of the web?  Even while I’m in the very presence of the natural wonder and beauty of all the strip malls of Oak Lawn?

“No!” I said, out loud.  And I stomped my foot for emphasis.  I refuse to live with the sad desperation of someone who needs the constant stimulation of a computer connection to feel alive and fulfilled.  “I do not need this computer!” I shouted as I stood up and cast the vile machine into the fire.

Well…okay…that last part just happened in my mind.  I didn’t actually throw the computer in the fire.  That would be a very expensive way of making a point.  But I did turn it off.

“There!” I said with satisfaction.  And then I sat down, took a few deep breaths and turned my attention back to the soothing rhythms of the flaming fire.  “Yes,” I thought, “this is better.  So much better.  This is the natural pace at which we were meant to live.”

And I spent the next hour simply relaxing, watching the dancing flames, and texting back and forth with several friends.

“Yep, this is how the pioneers used to do it,” I thought, as my phone softly beeped, signaling the arrival of a fresh text message.