You Were Wondering If Wilson Is Orange Yet?

I wrote a story a while back [Sept. 17^th] about a pumpkin—we named him “Wilson”—that began growing in our yard after Nadia threw out the remains of an old pumpkin by some bushes after Halloween, last year.  Nadia wasn’t cultivating pumpkin plants on purpose.  There was nothing intentional about this, Wilson just began growing on his own.  Back in September when I wrote the original story about Wilson he was completely green, as you can see from the picture that accompanied that story.  And we wondered if he would ever turn orange.  Come on, who ever heard of a green pumpkin?

Well, Nadia did some research [that means she typed some key words into Google] and she read that when a pumpkin is picked from the vine it will turn to the orange color that we’re all familiar with.

Yesterday, someone asked me, “Hey, how is Wilson doing?  Is he turning orange, yet?”

Those questions got me thinking that I should probably provide an update.  So, I took a picture of Wilson earlier today—it’s now early October—and you can see that, yes, he is slowly, gradually becoming more orange.  I don’t know how the ripening process happens, but Wilson is starting to look like the kind of pumpkins that we all know and love.  He’s got a ways to go still, sure, but he’s getting there.

Now, I had no idea when I took the photo earlier today, that I was in for quite a surprise.  But later this afternoon, something happened. 

I accidentally walked into the bathroom without knocking on the door, and my jaw hit the floor.  I discovered that Wilson hadn’t been turning orange, naturally.  I caught Wilson with some of Nadia’s make-up and other cosmetics.  That’s right, Wilson was turning orange…but it was all being done artificially!  It was Orange-In-A-Bottle!

I had heard that pumpkins do this kind of thing, sometimes, but I never guessed…that…well…Wilson?  Really?  Wilson is using Orange-In-A-Bottle?

Boy, am I stunned!

But you know what?  I have to admit.  I keep going outside to peek at him and the truth is, ….he’s actually looking pretty good!

So, I’ve got to get running.  I’m going to Walgreens to get some…well, never mind…I’m not telling.  But I’ve got a feeling that soon I’m going to be looking a lot better.

What Is That Strange Growth?

Nadia has an unusual practice of throwing all kinds of food outside for the squirrels and rabbits and other creatures—like that gnome—that inhabit our yard.  I’ve told her many times that this is unnecessary.

“They’re wild animals,” I’ve explained.  “They don’t need you to provide food.  In fact, it’s better for them if you don’t provide food.  That makes them lazy.”  To prove my point, I’ve shown her the small, crudely assembled hammocks that the rabbits have set up in the back yard.

But she continues to do it.

About 3 weeks ago, Nadia said, “Hey, you know how I’m throwing food out in the yard all the time?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, something’s growing,” she said.

For a minute, I thought she was looking at my stomach, but no, she meant something was growing in our yard.  A force was at work.  Without our knowledge or consent something had begun the mysterious process of cellular replication right in our midst.

Shooting up in the middle of one of our bushes, by the house, is a pumpkin plant.  It was not intentionally planted and cultivated.  The seeds must have just taken root and, without any attention from us, the plant is thriving.

In fact, we have a pumpkin that’s growing on the plant.  And it’s getting pretty big.  It’s that time of year where it is growing rapidly.  Two weeks ago it was about the size of an apple.  Now, it’s already larger than a basketball.  If it continues at this rate, next week my plan is to put wheels on it, install an engine, and begin driving it around town.  (Hey, Cinderella has proven that it can be done.)

We’re actually getting kind of excited about our big, homegrown pumpkin.  (I’ve named him “Wilson”…It’s not a volleyball, but the concept of a spherical friend is similar.)  We normally get a pumpkin or two every year for Rachel, anyhow.  So, this year we don’t have to buy one.  We’ll have our own that we’ve grown.

Someone said to me, recently, “That Nadia seems to have an ability to cultivate plants without even trying.” 

I thought, “Hmm, that’s true.”

So, I’ve given her a few dollar bills to crumple up and throw out into the back yard.  Hey, it’s worth a shot.  Let’s see if she can grow a money tree.  That way we can buy all new hammocks for the rabbits.

                 Here's a photo of Nadia with "Wilson".